Categories
Books Mental Health Writing

My book is here!!!

Today is 22 February 2024. On 24 February 2020, I finished the first draft of Finding Peace: Devotionals for Christians With Anxiety. What followed was a maelstrom of “Oh, hell, where is my therapist when I need him?” and editing this book to within an inch of its life–and that was before sending it off to a professional editor. Then it loitered in my computer for a few years, trapped by its creator’s fear that it’d be rejected. Until a certain daughter of mine broadcast to friends and family alike that I’d written a book.

Today my print copy came, and I’m so excited! I finally get to say, “Buy my book.” My hope is to make enough money off this book to launch the next one, and then eventually to be able to help other writers publish their books. The goal is not only my own success as a writer, but that of others, as well.

Click the link to get your copy. And thank you.

FINDING PEACE: Devotionals for Christians With Anxiety
Nesbitt, Sara D and Aykut, Anday
Categories
Books Writing

Clicking “Submit”

I am usually the last person you’ll hear talk about “submitting” to anything or anyone, but sometimes “submit” brings with it the greatest feeling of freedom. In the words of Luvvie Ajiyi Jones, it’s like going from swimming to floating.

As I type this, I’m floating. I’m in warm Caribbean waters, floating on my back, letting the gentle waves bouy me. Water laps into my ears, drowning out all sounds. The sun is warm on my face and chest, and every part of me is relaxing on the water, trusting it to hold me up. In my fantasies, of course. In reality, I’m sitting in the living room on a grey, chilly winter day.

You see, today was a “submit” day. Today was the day I chose to do our taxes for the year. My goal used to be to have them done before the beginning of soccer season just because taxes take a number of hours to do, and I didn’t want to start late or have to take a break from them once I got started. It quickly gets addicting having the relief of taxes done and the refund sitting in the account before the end of February. I was going to work on them last weekend but got invited out for coffee, and that was a more important thing in my world.

Today I clicked “submit” or, rather, “file federal return.” Our taxes are done. The IRS has accepted them, and I don’t have to worry about them now. Having that burden off my shoulders was tremendous! And even though I only usually promote my personal stuff, let me just say that Tax Act made filing so ridiculously easy!

On Tuesday I clicked “submit” on another big project–my book. It’s gone through a bajillion tweaks, especially the cover. The last copy was the best, and I ordered a print copy to see how the beautiful eproof will translate to paper binding. Hopefully, that’ll arrive late next week. That was something else that I’m happily getting off my shoulders so I can turn my focus to my next book.

Ahhh, yes. The next book. A work of heart, soul, and psyche. This one is brutal to write. It started with a really good therapy session, a session that left me feeling like my psyche had gone ten rounds with Mohammed Ali and also that it’d taken 240 volts. It felt bruised, battered, worn out, and energized all at once. That’s a damn good session, right there! I texted that to my male bestie. I didn’t want to blow up his phone with texts about it so I just texted that I’d fill him in tomorrow. (It was evening when we were having this convo.) I was going to email it, but then I thought, I want to be able to build on this as necessary without fear of accidentally clicking “send” prematurely. So I put everything into a .doc. By the time I was done, it was 3 1/2 pages, single-spaced. (To give you an idea, a solid 20-minute sermon is four pages.) I emailed it to him. The following morning I started editing. Not long after that, I put it into my bookwriting app. I’ll share more details about this book in a future post.

In beginning this book, I submitted to something bigger and more powerful than I alone–the power of story and its ability to connect us to others who share our pain.

Categories
Books

“Maus I”–Thoughts and Reflections

When I was in eighth grade, our English teacher had us watch Escape From Sobibor. Sobibor was a Nazi extermination camp in Poland that housed Russian POWs as well as Jews, Romanis, and others who the Third Reich deemed “undesirable.” To this day, I have no idea why our teacher had us watch this. It seems reasonable that it would have been an introduction to the Holocaust as a precursor to reading The Diary of Anne Frank, but it wasn’t, and we didn’t read it. What I do know is that it was my first exposure to the horrors that were the Holocaust and that led me to learning about this period of history, ultimately focusing on the psychological factors that would lead one seriously psychologically fucked up (not an actual diagnosis) dude to, in turn, convince millions of people that one people group was evil because they didn’t look like everyone else.

(*Side note*–In more recent studies on race in America, I’ve learned that the anti-Black laws of the Jim Crow era were considered to be “too extreme” by Nazi standards. Yes, the Nazis in the ’30s looked to America for guidance on how to oppress racial minorities but rejected some of what we were doing because it was too much.)

When Maus hit the news as the latest on the banned book list, I had to investigate this. I also resolved to read it, no matter what. Why? Because reading books outside of my usual preferences of genres and authors stretches my mind. Also, if someone is finding a book offensive enough to want to remove it from age-appropriate curricula, then I’m curious about what’s so bad about it.

Maus tells the story of the author’s parents’ experiences living as Jews in Nazi-occupied Poland. The story bounces between the modern day as Artie, the author–Art Spiegelman–talks to his father and also deals with the frustrations of their relationship; and the past as Vladek tells his story and shares his memories with his son. The book is a graphic novel with Jews portrayed as mice, Nazis as cats, and Polish citizens as pigs. Y’all, I’d never read a graphic novel in my life before this one (stepping outside my preferred genre). The anthropomorphisms soften but don’t negate the impact of the story.

I don’t want to give spoilers, but it made me feel. Spiegelman conveys the hope, fear, uncertainty, and sadness his parents experienced as they tried to avoid arrest. His frustration with his aging father also comes through the pages as he grapples with the disparity in the situations between his own upbringing in modern day New York (well, modern in the mid 1980s) and his father’s life back in Poland in the ’30s and ’40s. This frustration comes to a head at the end of the book which left me angry and sad for Vladek, though I could also empathize with Artie’s frustrations over this emotional disconnect between father and son.

As the McMinn County, Tennessee, school board pointed out, there is partial nudity and profanity in the book, and given its subject matter, there are also several incidents of violence. Nothing in this book, however, can compare with watching dozens of nude women and children being gassed to death in a Sobibor gas chamber, nor can it compare with the portrayal of an SS soldier coldly shooting a Jewish mother and her newborn infant, also in Escape From Sobibor. If books and movies lead us to pursue their subject matters–especially history–and that pursuit of knowledge further leads us to learn things like white supremacy is evil and how propaganda works, then there is no explicit threat in these materials. The only reason people have problems with teenagers learning about the people who were the targets of pogroms of genocide aimed at exterminating an entire race of people is, those teenagers might learn how to be more empathetic towards people not like them–or their parents. And echoing what many have said, eighth graders see worse on TV, video games, on social media, and on the internet.

Categories
Books Ministry

More about the Voices Project

To submit your own contribution, email it to Voices@SaraDNesbitt.com. Please feel free to ask any questions you may have in the comments.

Categories
Books

Voices of Color

In light of the lynching of George Floyd, an African American man in Minneapolis who was killed by a police officer, and the subsequent peaceful protests throughout the country, stories started popping up in social media–stories by friends, people of color I like and respect. Who, exactly, would hear them? Outside of their friends lists, how many White people actually know anything about their struggles with racism or the pain they face watching their children being the target of racist, bigoted comments? My guess is, not enough.

As the African American voices (Can I call them Black voices for the sake of typing brevity?) rose in waves from large cities and small towns around the globe, my own voice needed to be quiet. This is frustrating because the color of my skin, a virtue of my genetics, gives me a privilege and voice my Black co-createds lack. For the last week, I’ve thought, How can I use my voice and my privilege to make things better?

It’s not my voice that needs to be heard, though.What if I used my privilege to highlight and amplify the voices of persons of color? And that is what I want to do–amplify their voices. I want to be the microphone and amps through which Blacks can speak so other Whites can hear them.

So I got an idea.

I could collect and curate stories of racism from members of the African American community. I could share their stories in their voices in a book. They wouldn’t need much at all from me. Maybe a few lines of intro, maybe a little extra information they share with me.

If you’re interested in letting me share your story, I promise the utmost respect. It’s your story, your tone, your voice. I would only be the amplifier. To share your story, email me at voices@SaraDNesbitt.com. The minimal information I’d want to accompany your story is your first name, gender, and approximate age (by decade – i.e., 50s, 30s, etc.). You can choose to be anonymous, too. Other information you can share if you wish is your last name and where you live.

I’m humbled and excited about the prospect of this book. It’s time for White people to hear the true stories of our African American fellow citizens first-hand. My hope is that through these stories understanding will come.

Categories
Books

Finding Peace

I’m in a writer’s group, and someone commented this morning that his family isn’t supportive of his writing. At the same time, he shared he’d had a successful book-signing event. Writers write books for many different reasons. Sure, as creators of ideas and worlds, we like some external validation for what we write. We want people to read our works and extol their virtues far and wide so we can sell more copies. I know of no one so wealthy that they have just given their books away for free.

This post started me thinking about my own first book. Finding Peace is specifically for people dealing with anxiety. It’s not my deciding one day to write a devotional guide to make beaucoup bucks. It represents success purely in its existence — my own personal success over anxiety. It was only through suffering and struggling through the feelings and treatment that enabled me to write this book. It was the discouragement that came with relapses back into anxiety and being blindsided with post-traumatic stress that made this book possible.

Anxiety and blessings from God are not mutual exclusive. They can and often do coexist. My hope is that someone who reads this book finds such a blessing, if in nothing else than in realizing that they have no need to feel guilty when a gracious God isn’t judging or hating them for feeling anxious.

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